Friday, October 15, 2010

The Rise of Anal Sex




I may shock you today as I delve into a topic that is, to be honest, slightly out of my comfort zone: anal sex between men and women.

But I was reading Slate yesterday — they have a great column called "Human Nature" that I like — and I came across a piece that reported on a new national sex survey that was recently published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine.

The precis: We're all having more sex, and more kinds of sex than ever before, and we're getting sexually active at younger ages. But the "big story," as Slate writer William Saletan puts it, is anal sex! In 1992, a similar survey found that 16 percent of women aged 18-24 had tried it. Now the number is more like 40 percent. And in 1992, the highest percentage of women in any age group who admitted to anal sex was 33 percent. Now it's 46.

Saletan goes on to say: "The last time I looked at the anal sex data, I figured that most women who reported having done it meant they'd tried it just once. I was wrong. … One-third of these women say they've done it in the last month. Among all women surveyed, the number who reported anal sex in their most recent sexual encounter was three percent to four percent. That's a lot of butt sex. And remember, this is what women are reporting. If anything, they're probably understating the truth."

So, he wonders, what's the deal? Why are women so into it?

In the hopes of answering that question, he checks out the orgasm data and finds: "Among women who had vaginal sex in their last encounter, the percentage who said they reached orgasm was 65. Among those who received oral sex, it was 81. But among those who had anal sex, it was 94. Anal sex outscored cunnilingus." [You can read the data for yourself if you don't believe it: Table 5, Pages 357-8.]

"What could explain this?" Saletan asks. "Taboo thrill? Clitoral migration? Some new kind of vegetable oil?"

Giving the data another go, he finds that 86 percent of women who had anal also had vaginal sex, 72 percent also received oral sex, and 31 percent also had partnered masturbation. As he puts it, "The more sex acts a woman engaged in during the encounter, the more likely she was to report orgasm. These other activities are what gave the women their orgasms. The anal sex just came along for the ride. ... Women who were getting what they wanted were more likely to indulge their partners' wishes. It wasn't the anal sex that caused the orgasms. It was the orgasms that caused the anal sex."

If anyone has thoughts about Saletan's conclusion — if anyone wants to argue that anal, in itself, is a sure-fire way for a woman to orgasm, or is immensely more pleasurable than other bedroom activities — please give us the low-down.

I myself have never tried that method, and I have ZERO interest in it. I can't see how it would be anything but very painful, and I'd prefer not to find out just how painful it might be. However, I may be slightly prudish. As I've said a bunch of times now, I don't even like giving blow jobs.

Perhaps it's worth adding that contrary to popular belief, anal sex is not the wildest sexual fantasy of every single man in the world. Plenty of the guys I've dated, who seem to have healthy libidos and to be liberal thinkers about sexuality, were not into it.

Ladies, if any of you want to tell me what I'm missing, or correct me or back me up on any point here, please do!

5 comments:

  1. maura_kelly

    Thanks, Jack. Very interesting that you guys have simultaneous orgasms that way! And good advice about not doing anything that makes you physically or psychologically uncomfortable

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  2. I am a woman who loves anal sex.
    02:45:12 PM
    Tuesday, October 12, 2010
    Posted by: ilovemyharley


    First off, I disagree with Saletan's conclusion. "It wasn't the anal sex that caused the orgasms. It was the orgasms that caused the anal sex." I have amazing orgasms during anal sex. Most of the time my boyfriend and I cum at the same time during anal sex, something we have never been able to do through regular sex. It's important to remember that everyone is different, and that I am merely stating my own personal experience: I wanted to see what anal pleasure would feel like so I bought a vibrator about the size of my middle finger, and experimented with it. I liked it a lot. So when I finally entered the committed relationship I'm in now (and we both got tested) I decided I'd try anal sex. My boyfriend puts a ton of lube on my ass and starts with his fingers and then I become more relaxed and he eventually puts his penis in me. If it doesn't feel good for me then we stop and we try more lube, or we just stop. Usually we have a very strong simultaneous orgasm. I like it a lot. And perhaps I am not the norm, but I am sure there are other women out there who are just like me. I am not sure why it is so taboo. Additionally, I want to encourage both woman and men never to do anything that they find unappealing, or which feels uncomfortable to them just to please someone else. If you cannot relax, because you are in pain then you can really damage yourself, and that's not worth it.

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  3. Monday, October 11, 2010
    Posted by: theda1

    I can see it as a reward for the guy, if he's taking care of his gal and making sure to do all he can to make sure she climaxes. I also think that with the increased availability and/or acceptance and viewing of pornography by women, especially younger ones, it is probably become a norm. But I highly doubt orgasm is achieved by anal sex alone!

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  4. First of all, I'm not sure women are the ones more into it, or it's just that men are wanting to experiment more because it is tighter. I have personally never liked it, and it seems that there are a lot of problems anal sex can cause that make it not worth it in the least to me-pleasing my partner or not! I actually dated a guy once who said that would be his favorite position if he was ever in a committed relationship, and that he'd probably only be happy if he got it at least once a week! Needless to say, I didn't get serious with this guy!

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  5. I really should have said that in the post itself but better late than never. Did you know: "Unprotected anal sex, regardless of whether it is practiced by straight or gay couples, is considered the riskiest activity for sexually transmitted diseases because of the physical design of the anus: It is narrow, it does not self-lubricate, and the skin is more fragile and likely to tear, allowing STDs such as HIV and hepatitis easy passage into the bloodstream." http://www.health.com/health/condition-article/0,,20188708,00.html

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